Holy mother of music! Meet Sister Mary McLarry – Belle of Steel #22

Born Sept. 13, 1932 – Died June 21, 2018 

Imagine that your head feels like it’s on fire. Chemicals put on your straight hair to turn it curly seem to be burning your scalp.  “It’s burning,” Mary cried out to the beautician in the Wichita Falls salon. She wiped the tears of pain from her face. “Please take it off, it hurts,” Mary screamed out to no avail as she gripped the chair. “Quit being so difficult,” her step-mother insisted. “You’re embarrassing me!” The beautician came over and checked the cap. When she removed it slightly, her eyes widened and her face grimaced in horror seeing the child’s burnt scalp. Mary had been right.  The permanent solution had burned her skin. Quickly the beautician took her by the hand to the sink and began to rinse. But it was too late. The singed hair sloughed off into the sink and reddened, second degree burn marks covered half the child’s head. “Oh, my heavens, what have you done to her?” the step-mother incredulously cried out.

 Little Mary McLarry’s head was chemically scorched. She was in so much pain, but dared not cry another tear in fear of the severe rebuking she would receive from her new step-mother.  Mary’s mother died when she was just eight and her father, not wanting to raise a daughter alone, quickly remarried a horrific woman who was jealous of Mary from the beginning. The step-mother was critical, overly strict and sent Mary away from the house as often as possible. Her father bought her a wig to wear at school. She was mocked by her fellow students who stared at her fake hair. But during the hot Texas summers when school was not in session, times at home were merciless. Battle after battle with her step mother. Mary spent much of her time sequestered away in her room.  Practicing the motions of her piano skills on her small desk, as she was not permitted to practice downstairs where the piano was located. Her step mother complained it was too loud. When she wasn’t practicing, she would often sing hymns from church quietly to herself. Or read whatever books she had gotten from the library. 

But that would change. One day, her father came upstairs and told her to pack a bag. He was taking her to the Our Lady of Victory (OLV) Convent in Fort Worth, Texas. He had enough of the bickering and his new wife’s complaining. Mary was just 12 years of age. “But Daddy, I don’t know anyone there. When will you come visit me?” Her father had no answer.  The nuns of OLV were gracious enough to take her in. Her father explained he had been widowed and that in order to make his new marriage work, Mary had to leave the home. As Mary entered the tiny room upstairs in the convent, she never felt more alone in her life. As she sat down her suitcase of books, music sheets, and the few pieces of clothing she owned, she knelt down to pray. But she wouldn’t cry.

The Sister’s of Mary of Nemur established a huge presence in Fort Worth’s catholic school development. After the yellow fever break out in central Texas, they relocated to Fort Worth. The decision was providential. Over a span of 40 years, the sisters established several other Texas schools, including St. Ignatius Academy in 1885 in downtown Fort Worth and Our Lady of Victory in 1910 (Smith, 2021).  

Mary was enrolled at OLV school and during her seventh-grade year, she met a friend that would remain a constant for her entire life, Larry Breedlove. They talked about books. They discussed the doctrines of their Catholic faith. Mary would play church music and Larry would attempt to sing. He was at OLV because he wanted to become a priest. She received the sacrament of confirmation in 1950 at Immaculate Conception Parish in Denton. She committed to a religious life as a nun on Sept. 1 of the same year with the Sisters of Saint Mary of Namur.  Many of those nuns had been her teachers while at OLV.

Mary was a brilliant student, who excelled in music. She played both the organ and piano. She obtained a scholarship to attend the American Conservatory of Music and in 1960 received a bachelor’s degree in music with a concentration on the piano. She then went on to complete a Master’s degree in literature from the University of Notre Dame in 1969, attending graduate schools during the summers. During the school year she taught religion and choir at Nolan Catholic High School.  To make money on the side, she taught piano lessons. She remained chaste and very committed to her Catholicism. Closeness to God had gotten her through some of the roughest times in her life. Her life-long friendship, with Larry Breedlove, who had indeed been ordained as a priest flourished.

In 1970, Father Breedlove became pastor of St. Peter’s Catholic Church in White Settlement, a suburb of Fort Worth. He hired Mary as his Director of Music and Literature. Mary worked with the organist Ruth Elsken to learn some of the more progressive music written by Dan Schutte and Marty Haugen. She formed a youth-based musical group with guitars, a couple of flutes and a trumpet. Masses at St. Peter’s were quite progressive during those 70s, reflecting the overall attempt to modernize the church in the post-Vatican II way which Father Breedlove embraced. Sister Mary, in her double-knit shirts, skirts, and loafers delighted in this role.  She sometimes wore a modest habit on her head to cover the wigged pony tail. In addition, she wore a leather-bound wooden cross. 

Mary was known for her caring, gentle, soft-spoken nature, but underneath that calm demeanor was a strong, determined spirit. Mrs. Ruth Elsken, the organist, remembers how she welcomed and encouraged all to experience liturgical music, despite the quality of their singing or prowess of musicianship. Not only did she become a progressive leader in music and literature at St. Peter’s, soon word of her expertise spread throughout the Diocese of Fort Worth. Her talent expanded into faith formation of future deacons for the diocese. In 1985, Mary decided to leave formal religious life and took on the responsibility of an adopted niece. This young girl, Jenepher attended Brewer High School and attended the St. Peter’s youth group. During her senior year, her father who was in the Air Force at Carswell air base in Ft. Worth, got orders to transfer. The girl was bereft and in tears at the youth group meeting. Mary, who had no children of course, talked to the parents and agreed to take the girl in for her senior year. Her friend, Father Larry Breedlove and several others tried to dissuade her, but Mary was adamant. She did, indeed, take in the girl. 

Mary doted on her and brought her to the masses, but often the girl skipped the youth group. Mary would say she had homework or some other excuse. Mary used her scant savings to buy the young girl a car. They became very close. The girl sometimes referred to Mary as “her mother.” Her friends, Camilla Reid, John Clark (church youth group leader), and Father Breedlove cautiously watched over the situation to ensure Sister Mary’s safety. After graduation, the girl stayed with Mary for a bit. While attending some college courses, she met her future husband. She became engaged and moved to Oregon, as he was going to finish college at the University of Oregon. The girl finished too, becoming a social worker. Mary stayed in touch by telephone, but was rarely invited up for trips. 

Shortly after taking the girl in, sometime after 1985, Bishop Delaney of Ft. Worth appointed her as the Director of Worship for the entire diocese. But Mary never stopped supporting the Sisters of OLV volunteering to fulfill whatever needs they incurred. Mary created LitNet a network of professional and non-professionals encouraging them to work within their parishes to coordinate progressive music and liturgical experiences. 

Father Breedlove had been relocated to Holy Name parish and Mary followed him there. Their friendship remained close until the very end. Some rumored that they were romantically involved, but that wasn’t the case.  Both shared a deep love of their faith and relished in their friendship. They often had dinners and gatherings with friends Camilla Reid and John Clark. Mary took several small road trips with them. Around 2004, Father Larry’s health began to decline. He developed lung cancer. Mary was there at his bedside everyday to care for him. Friends John and Camilla also helped out. Father Larry passed away on May 31, 2006. His three close friends, especially Sister Mary were distraught. It was a profound loss. Mary McLarry never seemed to fully get over it. She would have Camilla drive her to Father Larry’s grave to pray and lay flowers. 

What a difference Mary McLarry made for Catholics in the diocese. A leader in the St. Rita’s church, Joe Rodriguez remembers her fondly. She changed so much for the better to bring people together through liturgical music. Mary worked in this way for the Office of Worship until 2007 when she retired. Sadly, the brilliant mind of Sister Mary McLarry began a slow decline in her older age. She began to forget locations and purchases. Camilla once took her out near the airport in Hurst, Euless, Bedford for a dental appointment, as Sister Mary had a bad tooth. They drove all around and then Sister Mary said, “There it is,” pointing to a dental office. They went inside and the receptionist looked at them strange. She had no appointment there. On another occasion, Camilla visited Mary at her small home. In the bathroom were 8 bottles of shampoo. Mary said, “Oh? I don’t remember buying all those.” Gone were the days of leading music and motivating others. But the Sisters of OLV never abandoned her. They checked in on her often and kept her in their prayers. They brought her groceries and would bring her for ice cream. Camilla and John Clark sometimes took Mary to mass at the convent, especially for the annual Christmas Eve candlelight service. 

Camilla and John reached out to Jenepher, the adopted niece. She felt obligated to take Mary in, as Mary had done for her long ago. Jenerpher’s husband drove to White Settlement, near Carswell air base, and sold Mary’s house. They packed her up and took her to live in Oregon. Mary reached out by phone and letters to John and Camilla. She missed them very much. Camilla describes a road trip she and John took to visit her there. 

Mary died at the age of 85, being cared for in Washington state by the niece she raised Jenepher. Her life was celebrated with remembrances from the Sisters of her order, many from OLV. First, at a packed-out rosary vigil at Thompson, Harveson and Cole funeral home, followed by a standing room only funeral at St. Peter’s Catholic church in Fort Worth. For Mary’s incredible faith and unique gift of both liturgy and liturgical music to north Texas, AgeView Press honors Mary McLarry as Belle of Steel #22. She truly changed her corner of the world.

Military Connections: Mary’s connections to the military are strong. She ministered to many military Catholics stationed at Carswell Air Force Base. In addition, as mentioned her adopted niece, Jenepher’s father was enlisted in the Air Force and was stationed there for several years.